Comments on: Confessions of a GenXer

By: John Ballard

John Ballard — Sat, 01 Jan 2005 09:08:22 +0000

You are describing guilt, a corrolary to shame.
Growing us as a Southern Baptist I was spoon-fed guilt to the point that by the time I was in high school I remember looking at my class ring and feeling guilty for having such a nice piece of expensive (to me, at the time) piece of jewelry.
It was one of those life-changing moments, and the start of a personal journey toward freedom from counterproductive guilt.
I accept that not all guilt is bad. A fear of guilt protects us from nihilism, drives us to duty, enlivens our conscience, and separates us as human beings from the rest of the animal kingdom. Without a sense of guilt we become savage, like the ordinary people in Rwanda who cut their heighbors to pieces with machetes. Like the architects of the World Trade Center disaster. Like those who routinely carried out the atrocities we have all read about in Saddam’s Iraq. It could be that suicide killers are driven by the reassurance that they need not fear guilt. How can a dead person “fear” anything? Just know this: as long as you can still feel guilt, you can know that you are still able to have compassion. Whether or not there is a constructive way to convert guilt to compassion, or a meaningful way that the one can be relieved by the other, there is definitely a link. Our mission is to discover, each of us individually, how to make that connection, converting it into some kind of redemptive action. There are extreme cases when an ultimate sacrifice is demanded. But those situations are few and far between. Something less demanding is really better, because it allows us to remain alive and influential, each within his own small constellation, maintaining a spark of humanity in an otherwise potentially savage world.

By: Mark

Mark — Sat, 01 Jan 2005 04:39:09 +0000

Joshua:
I really enjoyed the first post on the new blog. I can assure you, though, that isn’t just Gen-Xers engaged in shallow, self-absorbed life styles. Whenever I look in the mirror, I catch a glimpse of a guy who is similarly guilty most of the time.

By: Sidesspot

Sidesspot — Sat, 01 Jan 2005 04:06:20 +0000

Confessions of a GenXer

Josh Claybourn, one of the authors of In the Agora, has a thoughtful and soul-searching post on being a GenXer Christian in the wealthiest nation the world has seen. In the light of the suffering in the Indian Ocean, his conscience has been pricked, …

By: Mark S.

Mark S. — Sat, 01 Jan 2005 03:07:28 +0000

Josh,
Great reflections for year-end. We are pretty much the most well off Christians in history. We need to translate that into action for others. Unfortunately, for whatever reason, that’s not always as easy as it should be.
God Bless and Happy New Year,
Mark Sides

By: Pieter Friedrich

Pieter Friedrich — Fri, 31 Dec 2004 18:26:18 +0000

I can’t really add anything to what you wrote, Josh, beyond saying that it was excellent. Wow.

By: Joel Thomas

Joel Thomas — Fri, 31 Dec 2004 07:34:30 +0000

Years of struggling with mental illness has made me more aware of the sufferings of others, but not always more sympathetic. In fact, at times thinking about war, world disasters, crime, the personal problems of family and friends and so forth added to the depressive swings such that I sometimes trained myself to be indifferent so that I would be better in control of my emotions.
However, as the movie “The Machinist” demonstrated, the conscience can be a very powerful thing and feelings of guilt can be positive motivators to do something different.
I’ve given a lot to charity over the years, but I’ve spent far more on myself, my family and my friends. In several places, I have posted John Wesley’s admonition to “earn all you can, save all you can, give all you can.” But this year I bought a new computer — not because I really had to have one but because I wanted one that was faster, cooler, etc.
I can rationalize that I drive a car that has 184,000 miles on it. I can rationalize that I probably give away more money than a lot of others. But I still feel stingy.
I felt my brain starting to shut down as the deaths from the tsunami mounted. At a few thousand, I felt really, really bad. Now I feel kind of numb — the numbers seem unreal and my relative ability to help out is what, exactly? So I don’t really care any more. Or do I? I didn’t sleep well for the past two nights — very unusual for me.
As Christians, we are to rejoice at all times. But I think it has to be an often uncomfortable and afflicted joy. True joy, yes that we feel down to our toes, but that will never be entirely separated from our feelings on the plight of others. Jesus wants us to be both “at peace” and restless.
Maybe my conscience, guided by God’s grace, won’t cause me to do anything different today. But maybe tomorrow, or the next day, or the day after that, God’s sanctifying grace will take hold once again.
Maybe your headache won’t change you today. But sharing this post might change the rest of us.